The interesting thing about time is that it can go by in a wink, like life, or it can drag on like some form of ancient water torture, one drop at a time.  I’ve decided to spend this time with you.  Some of you may know that I’ve had a few weeks to think about my life.  Two and a half weeks ago, I experienced some discomfort in my chest that was NOT normal.  The problem with chest discomfort is that, sometimes it’s just that.  Unfortunately, heart symptoms and digestive indicators can mask each other.  So, I joke a lot about the magic question,  ”Will I burp, or will I die?”  This time, however, with three previous CATH experiences, I knew that the latter one was more likely than the former.  After trying one day of home remedies, I acquiesced to the “adult DVD” inside my brain, and went in for a check-up.   All the while I was hoping that my instincts were misguided, but knew deep down that they were not.  In fact, when the cardiologist recommended a CATH, it was like the proverbial Déjà vu all over again.

The drill is well known to me, but the outcomes never are.

This time, nine years after my previous CATH, I utilized something that was not part of my earlier support network, FACEBOOK.   For those of us who mainline connectivity, social networking can be a very powerful and meaningful thing.  In fact, I used to speak all over the United States about blogging, texting, and You Tube long before Facebook was in vogue.   Well, of my designated FRIENDS on Facebook, over 200 took the time to respond to my announcement of impending medical attention.  The result was an unbelievable level of love that poured out in these comments from my FRIENDS.

Today, I truly do feel surrounded and bathed in love, and it’s a very interesting cascade of love, because it’s crosses six decades of my life.  I’ve been touched by childhood friends, high school and college friends, associates, former students, and former employees and co-workers from almost every job I’ve ever held.  I’ve been touched by good wishes and warm thoughts from all over the globe.

This will be a good day no matter what the outcome because I leave here confirming that there are far more good hearted and caring people in this world than there are destructive ones, and I do believe that we will eventually prevail.

As I look out of my office window today, I see a sky that is so blue, so perfect and reminiscent of why I have loved living in this State, in this country, on this planet.   I take a deep breath and remember today’s blue sky, tepid weather, and amazing ever changing seasons, and I appreciate my life on all levels; the students that I’ve nurtured, the amazing  jobs that I’ve been privileged to have had, and most of all,  the beautiful, caring, family that has given me love, light and hope for the past 40 plus years.

One healer reminded me to embrace today the memory of the touch from the little hands of my grandchildren; another reminded me of how I vaccinated his soul with positive energy as a young student.  Regardless of the sentiment, it’s been so fulfilling that all of those people are holding me in their hearts just like I’ve held them in mine all of these years.

My mother’s favorite saying was from John Wesley, ““Do all the good you can. By all the means you can. In all the ways you can. In all the places you can. At all the times you can. To all the people you can. As long as ever you can.”

I’ve embraced those words, and know that many of you do as well.  Hold onto love. It’s the source of our energy and strength.

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