The oldest wants skis, some new goggles, and mittens

The youngest girl just longs for Barbies and kittens

The second-grade girl wants what gifts most of all?

A puff vest, a head set, another big doll

And speaking of that, one girl asked for the best

A toilet and bath tub to go with the rest

Of the 18-inch doll things I’ve bought for two years

Which included a shower to clean her doll’s ears

They have couches and tables, some lamps, and a bed

A washer, no dryer, and a big double bed

There are lights and end tables, a fridge, and a sink

Heck, this doll’s house is better than mine; yeah, you think?

They have play clothes, and dress clothes, and even a bra

Some pajamas and undies, and one gown I saw

Now what’s our eccentric one want? That’s a challenge

She’s smart and creative, a thinker with talent

She’d probably like some tough book or a game

Or a new 3D puzzle to drive us insane

Then there’s finally, the baby, that 1-year-old guy

He’d like a toy hammer or things that can fly

Like bubbles, or airplanes, a drone or a kite

Or anything else he can hit, throw, or bite

I also buy stuff for some nephews and then

I give cash to some others and then give again

To Toys for Tots, churches, and homeless kids, yes

I give money to missions, and you know the rest

Of course I must buy things for all of our brood

And don’t forget neighbors and guys nicknamed Dude

When I hear my friends mention Jolly St. Nick

I can fit that description: I’m old, fat, and quick

To reach for my wallet and give it away

Yep, the only thing this Nick won’t buy is a sleigh

Cause I’m much more like Goldilocks than that old elf

I don’t like it too cold or too hot myself

But I’ve also found out after decades of living

That it’s better to imitate the Zuckerbergs’ giving

Cause you can’t take it with you; no matter, my friend

So you might as well share it and share it again.

Merry Christmas and Happy Hanuka